What a question.
Are there people in your life that truly support, want to see you win, value, and respect you?
I think it’s important such support systems are in your life because that is how you become a well rounded person, you can grow and thrive in this world?
I had such a wonderful and honest conversation with one of my closest friends not too long ago, and as I was reflecting on growing and becoming who I am in this moment right now i can say that I didn’t have that in the way I needed.
Really and truly your environment shapes you, good or bad however, it may. Something that I found in myself was that there was a deficit of support, value and growth in a lot of the things that I had seen growing up and in a lot of experiences that I had with family, friends, community etc that left a huge hole but also a severely unstable sense of self. This was reflective in the way that I would engage with people, the world and myself. I didn’t know where to start.
How can you give what you don’t have? How can you value yourself when you are not led by example or thrive when your environment is that of stagnation? Who is there to guide you in the right direction that has been where you have been? Of course for some, they go against all the odds but many fall through the cracks and become lost to this world.
Community matters because it takes a village.
It is one thing for people to say that they love and support you, but it’s another thing to really truly have champions in your life that I want to see you succeed because they love you. It’s also of great importance to have older siblings, mentors, cousins family friends that can pour wisdom into you and pattern you in the ways that you need so you don’t embarrass yourself in this one life we have to live. A sore spot for me was that I didn’t have that, something I so longed for.
Love is such an interesting concept to me.
I used to think love was all the highs of life, it should be like the rom-com books I pored through as a teenager, with warm hugs, overwhelming affection I was terribly disappointed when reality wasn’t quite as sickly sweet. Today real, true love to me encompasses many things: sacrifice, mutual respect, discipline, effort , growth, stability and peace (and Jesus). Of course there are the fun aspects but that comes with the hard work and finding solace upon climbing (and continuing to climb) many of those hurdles with the people that you love.
I had to get out or I was going to do something I regret.
I changed my environment I found people who had been where I was and showed me what could be possible. And for you all I am so so so grateful.
For what the future holds things are looking up. It can too for you.
Find your people, allow them the opportunity to help you. I struggled initially with the vulnerability that came with allowing the people that wanted truly the best for me, seeing me in all phases good and bad. But alls well that ends well. We thank God for growth!
Anyways back to regular programming.
Lots of love
-Lero 💕